Our Pitch on 'Pitch, Please!': The Game of the Sixty Second Screenplay
OH MY G... is that!?... IT IS!... a HOLLYWOOD PRODUCER! And they are entering the elevator.... ALONE! Must fast walk without looking like a total spaz. It's shutting! SPAZZING! OW. the door just shut on my leg, but it's opening back up! What do I say!? I've spent countless hours deep in daydreams at work preparing for this moment. I just realized I'm staring at them and grinning. I am such an idiot. GET IT TOGETHER. The elevator is starting to move. I can't speak! Derp. Words. And Stuff. Where Go? Weird pictures... the daydreams in all of their weirdness, that's all I've got, visual clues, alright... here we go...
"Sooooooo, there's this cop, he lives in Egypt with the pyramids and Nile and cats and stuff, and, and he loves this woman who is married to this horrible guy who, like, is really mean, and the cop, he comes and saves the day and kills the guy and saves the woman and he [TURNING IN BADGE] turns in his badge and they fall in love, but she has this kid who plays music really good and [PERPETUAL POP] they form a pop band and it starts to take off when all of a sudden [DADDY MUMMY] the dad comes back as a mummy and tries to eat the kid and the ex-cop has to fight him and, but, umm, [GENRE!?] it's a sci fi movie so the cop, ex-cop, has a laser gun and the mummy is like a metal exo-skeleton under there somehow and stuff instead of a regular skeleton and they have this crazy fight still set to pop music [BECAUSE IT IS PERPETUAL] and destroy a lot of Egyptian relics [HEROIC FEATS OF PROPERTY DAMAGE] and bad things happen and then [SUPER NATURAL DISASTER] there is a really big, like-supernatural, natural disaster and the Nile floods, and the mummy ends up unraveling himself to give them all something to hold on to as a tidal wave wipes out the pyramids but then he rusts and the cop, ex-cop, and the mummy's mommy, umm, the mommy of the mummy's kid tries to save him, but he is frozen in place and lifeless, so the cop makes him, has him erected like a statue in what is left of the town square and everybody, and that's, that's, that's it." *TAKES IN A VERY DEEP AND VERY VERY AUDIBLE BREATH*
The elevator dings. They're still standing there. Did I just blow their mind!? Wow, it's happening! They're turning their head to look at me!
"Let me give you a call back." WOAH. THEY WANT MY NUMBER. This is big! What the crap is my number!? "555-9953!" They pull a phone away from their other ear, push a button, shake their head, and exit the elevator.
I AM SOOO GOING TO BE FAMOUS. Carolyn Main, eat your heart out!
Pitch, Please! is a party-style card game playable by 3 or more people from comedian and cartoonist, and now game designer, Carolyn Main. It utilizes a deck of cards all containing art from the mind of Carolyn. Said mind and art are both scary and interesting and, above all else, CREATIVE! The art works in tandem with a small phrase on each of the 53 cards, some that were used in the above scenario (Turning in Badge, Perpetual Pop, etc.).
As in that example above (taken from one of our actual play tests), players will work as individual studios presenting a movie idea to a Producer. If your creative energies are flowing good enough at the get-go, then you can even name your studio! One player will take the role of the Producer while the other players each draw 5 cards. They then have one minute to prepare a movie pitch based off of a minimum of three cards in their hand. The Producer chooses a genre as broad or specific as they would like (there is a reference card in there if you need some ideas), and the studios get to work! The Producer keeps an eye on the clock and calls time when the minute passes. Then they pick the lucky Studio to go first and present their blockbuster idea.
Studios are going to plan plot points around a number of their cards. If they can use all five cards in their movie, it could mean more points for them in the end! Pitches only last a minute each, so make it snappy! A good pitch should also conclude with a working title and a tag line (this was my Kryptonite). At the end of that minute, the Producer can ask about the film and propose ideas on how it might work, or possibly just insult the concept entirely. If you want to be like that. Other studios, as well as the Producer, can also chime in about possible titles or taglines. Doing so can net them one of the cards used by the Studio in their pitch for scoring.
After the first pitch is completely over, the Producer will move on to the next Studio until all Studios have went. Then comes, JUDGEMENT DAY: Son of the Pitch, where the Producer talks about what they liked or disliked about the pitches and chooses one to get the green light! You are the weakest pitch, goodbye.
The Studio that won the pitch will get the cards they used in the pitch turned facedown into a scoring stack. If another player chimed in with a winning opinion regarding a title or tagline, one of those cards go in a separate stack for them. The winning Studio then becomes the Producer and the show goes on until everyone decides to call it a night. At the conclusion, the player with the highest stack of cards wins the game.
A couple of points to note, it is advised that there only be two Studios tops in each game. If there is more than three players, team up and work together! You can play it with more than two studios, but doing so makes each round last longer and also makes the deck run out far too fast. That is really one of my only complaints on this game. I feel like the deck is way too small and repeating plot points if you play it through a shuffle can kind of make some pitches repeat slightly. Also, I should note that playing the game this long means you have to tally on paper the number of cards each person has scored so you can shuffle up those as well. There are some plot points as well that may not be common knowledge (I totally had to look up what a Tchotchke is) and others that may be kind of... awkward... (Ok, so I have this time travelling group of ghouls, and... what the heck am I going to do with Butt Beach?...). Speaking of butts, the Kickstarter places this game in the age range of 8+, butttttttt the cards are occasionally rearing up some butt-ugly derrieres. And there are some bouts of other cleavage and at least one suggestive, Miley Cyrus at the grammies inspired big pointy hand in a strange place card. So, use your judgement on who your game group is. Especially if they're not very creative. You can only let naming your title after the cards used in the plots slide like once...
All cards aside, this game was pretty fun with the right crowd! Coming up with a working film idea while the clock is ticking gets pretty scary, but when you start pitching, some pretty hilarious things can come out of this game! The cards and art were very creative, and some of the plot points definitely brought up particular block buster inspired moments. I'm just already wishing for a sequel with which to combine this deck! Still, you'll have a lot of fun and laughs out of this one. WYLD Gaming gives Pitch, Please! a SHOE-IN as an easy to learn and fun to play party game that will be sure to be a cult hit at your home! The Kickstarter (here) is currently running with only two weeks left and has already hit well above their funding goal! So, grab your popcorn, dim the lights, and watch your friends Pitch, Please!
Please note, this is a review of a game that is in pre-production meaning some mechanics, appearances, rules, and other components may change. WYLD Gaming was provided this copy for review purposes but was not otherwise compensated in any manner, nor were their words, results, or review scores influenced in any way by anyone outside of the author's own opinions and perspective. If you've enjoyed this review, we encourage you to share it with others to help WYLD Gaming get similar opportunities in the future while also helping the game being reviewed get more attention for their Kickstarter campaign. Thank you!